There is a lot to be said for this character, and by this character, but only as long as he’s playing OK. If the driver’s working and the putts are dropping then he’s your dream playing partner.

‘Work going OK? How’s the family? I like your new trousers…’

When the game goes south though he’s the ultimate pain in the backside. The shoulders slump, the conversation dries up, he leaves the tee in solemn silence before re-emerging at the green with a disconsolate look that, for a brief second, encourages some pity.

And then it drags on and you begin to feel guilty that you’re playing not too bad so, cleverly via his miserable osmosis, you begin to make a make a mess of your round. And then you drop the odd expletive and you complete the round quietly fuming that he’s ruined your only game of golf in a month.

All the while he’s got his act back together and posted 34 points to buffer.

Club golfer stereotypes – No 1: The sponger